Is This Off-Topic?

I knew it would come to this at some point. --I'm posting to procrastinate.  Figures.

I hope I didn't offend or freak out anyone by my last post, I was feeling a bit empowered as a female, while simultaneously frustrated at many things; don't ask me how that works, it's a mystery even to me, and I'm experiencing it first-hand.

I've been under-the-weather the past few days, only just recovered now.  I had to miss all four of my classes, one session apiece.  And now I have to catch up.  With an annotated paper proposal and an exam tomorrow.  Oh, joy.

I can't believe I've been back at school for almost a month.  It hardly feels that way, academically speaking.  Socially speaking, I'm not surprised at all.  So much has happened already, with that side of things.  Not that I'll get into specifics.  I don't do that anymore.  Well, that's a lie.  I'm such a gossip-monger.  One of my guy friends used another candid term for what I am, but I won't disclose that here.

Ahem.  Anyway.

Since I've been under-the-weather (I'm saying it this way because it seems classier than saying 'I've been sick'), I have been keeping up with new shows pretty religiously.  But I suppose that's my entertainment blog's subject matter...I should update that.  I've seen every premiere I remotely cared about, and I've only reviewed one.  Surprisingly, the only one I have reviewed so far was New Girl with Zooey Deschanel.  More surprisingly, not my favorite.  Not even close.  And I could have bet money, I was so convinced it would be, since I adore that girl.  But alas.  I am so off-topic.

But to be off-topic, you actually have to be on-topic in the first place, and I don't think a topic was ever clearly stated.

There was a huge but brief storm tonight.  I was walking across the main part of campus and suddenly the wind blew up and debris was everywhere and I thought for sure a tornado was going to suck me up into the sky.  I prayed for my life, and thankfully it worked out.

--Question: Is it wrong to have eye candy?  Because I think I have some now, and I'm quite enjoying it.  It's probably wrong.

Oh, well.  I really should get back to studying.

Christine out.

PS: I love The Office.  I've been re-watching season four this week.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5GXUs_-YTg&feature=related

Not Now, No

A short post.

Some food for thought:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1209556/500-Days-Summer-Revenge-writing-film-girl-dumped-you.html

Maybe you haven't seen that movie, though.

Some girls don't want to be in relationships?  What?  Are they mad?

No, they're quite sensible.  Not that Summer Finn in the movie was sensible, necessarily, but she figured love out eventually, when it hit her like a ton of bricks.

Recently--and I mean very recently, yesterday late in the evening, if I recall correctly--I realized I don't need all that right now.  Not that one should ever 'need' that; one should always strive to be complete in and of herself.

I work best in that way by distracting myself.  I get involved, I focus on seemingly random things, and, most of the time, I hang with my girls on a Saturday night instead of putting myself out there.

So I'm already fighting half the battle, distractions are great because they don't give you any time to think of the 'space' that might be filled with, say, a 'significant other,' or what have you (or what have you not, -haha-).  But there's still the matter of a healthy mentality to take on.  This mentality needs to be a self-exercise, a self-restraint.

A self-reminder.  No, I don't need someone right now.  I shouldn't 'need' someone ever.  I don't have time for another person in that way in the current state of the complicated equation that is my insane senior year life.

Because that's right, you know.  I simply don't have time.  Oh, I'd certainly make time, if there were someone to make time for.  That's the kind of person I am.  The kind of friend I am.  I'm extremely loyal, dutiful even.  It's one of the few virtues I practice regularly.

I also have an awful habit of being too forward.  Hopefully this self-realization will help me in quashing that habit.

I suppose all of that wasn't very clear.  I ought to sleep.

I must credit one of my friends for inspiration on the whole being sensible thing.  She's doing this 'no-dating-for-a-year' deal with herself.  Amen, sister.  Though I have to say, I'd have to be asked out on dates for that to apply to me, anyway.  That wasn't a darkly stated remark, I'm laughing.  Okay, it was a little dark.  But I'm amused.

Christine out.

PS:  Oh, and I wish I were going to the Maroon 5 concert Friday night.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=suRsxpoAc5w

A Sense of History

I honestly didn't realize it was 9/11 until about 30 seconds ago.  Well, really realize it, anyway.
Sometimes I worry myself that I don't have a sense of history; that I'm buying into the mentality that, well, life goes on, and there isn't anything anyone can do about it.

But you see, those things are true.  Life does go on.  There isn't anything we can do about that.  It's a fact of life that it will continue regardless, isn't it?

So, we're supposed to be mourning, I guess?  I think I'm done mourning.  I cried my little eyes out that day, ten years ago, in the sixth grade, when it happened.  I can't believe they let us watch that on the television during school.  And then my mother came to pick me up, because before that happened, I was feeling ill and told my teacher I needed to go home.

Maybe I felt ill because I innately knew something was terribly, horribly wrong?  Hindsight is twenty-twenty, or even better vision, because you can see the significance of the minutest details if you look back meticulously.

So I am remembering, after all.  It didn't take much, and there isn't much to remember from a sixth grader's perspective, but I'm doing it anyway.

I'm not very good at mourning.  At focusing on awful things that happened years ago.  Because I prefer to think of happier things.  In recent years, I've looked more to the future than to the past.  Looking to the future can make you paranoid.

Looking to the past can make you depressed.  But so can looking at the present, depending on your perspective.

For the moment, all I know is I have loads of homework, and not enough time in which to do it--not to mention compiling a budget request for the club I'm president of this year, sending in an evaluation of my recent Socials event, and writing a review of a local museum exhibit.  So I "shouldn't" even be writing this post.

I keep getting distracted from everything, and definitely from writing this.  I'm kind of at work right now.  It's just answering phones--but someone's got to do it.  And I just had a fifteen-minute conversation with a man who's trying to meet up with a friend, who is in class right now (???), for lunch, but she doesn't have a cell phone.  So I guess he's just going to creep on her with the information I gave him?  I hope I'm not being an enabler, or anything.  I only gave him general University information...

Anyway.

Christine out.